This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
