btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
