i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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