Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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