whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
What happened to fro yo and sex?
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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