For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
i wish my penis had a tongue
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Randomize
