thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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