STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize
