More tranny stories later!
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
