Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
