But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
How does it feel to date your dad?
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