Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize