i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
