Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
