Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
