brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize