Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
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