so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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