No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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