Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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