Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize