Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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