Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
