He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
