I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
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