I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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