He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize