this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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