I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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