The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Randomize
