What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I bet he comes in French.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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