if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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