she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
