This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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