nut hugger
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
