He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
