I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
