just survived the first fart of the relationship.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
