Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
