Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I understand Curling. That high.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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