NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Randomize
