Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize