Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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