I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
