Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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