Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
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