i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
