pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
