I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize