As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
