One girl and one boy is just not enough.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
