I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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