You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Just cropdusted the office
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
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